Thursday, just after I landed in Kansas City, I received an emergency call to photograph our friend's newborn baby. For those of us who know family “K” we were filled with joy over the upcoming birth of little Emersyn. Sadly she died before birth and these pictures would be the only memories they would have of their little girl.
Please pray for this family as they grieve the lose of their child. Many of us can’t help but wonder why God would allow a mother to carry a baby full term, and then call the child home before birth. The truth is we many never understand the will of God in these situations until we meet Him face to face. Our vision of time is different then God's. We see time as past and present, but He see's the future. His Word tells us, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you.” (Jeremiah 1:5) In other words God set’s us apart for His special purpose long before we were born. He created us to worship Him and no matter how difficult our situation might be, it’s vital to lean on Him and trust that He will carry us through.
I wish I had magical words in times like this, but I don’t. Nancy and I have a 20 year old daughter who is Autistic and on numerous occasions we've felt we couldn't take any more. But, it was during these times we found comfort in knowing He would carry us through.
Matthew 11:28-30 says, "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Simply put, a yoke is a long plank with 2 curves cut in the bottom. It fits over our shoulders and Christ’s allowing Him to ease our burdens. What a vision of comfort.
So, how can we help others in times of grief? Sometimes the fewer words the better. Let your friends grieve in their own way, don’t criticize or tell them how to feel. Give them time and space and remember it’s ok if they cry out or yell at God. He is big and He can handle it. Let your actions do the talking by bringing them meals, cleaning their house, or mowing the lawn. Men, take the husband/father out for a few hours and women take the wife/mother out for a time of rest and relaxation. Offer to take their children for a day to give the husband and wife time alone. Reach out to someone, share some love asking nothing in return and most of all lift them in prayer. This is how we reflect the love of God to others.